A BABY, A BUGGY, AND A DAY OLD CUPCAKE

I don’t know what happened.  It started out like any other day.  We got up at the same time, we ate at the same time, and we left at the same time.  There were no problems.  It was grocery shopping day.  I’ve come to like grocery shopping with Ellie now.  Especially since she’s been riding shot gun in the buggy.  It’s like our special time.  She holds the grocery list and pen and I roll her around.  But I don’t know what happened that day.  The trip was so off I might as well have gone to Kroger.

Normally, when we first walk in to Meijer, Ellie starts smiling and playing peek-a-boo with the greeter while I get the buggy situated.  Then as we drive off Ellie gives the greeter a big wave.  This time Ellie did NOT want to sit in the buggy.  She did for about three minutes, and then she started squirming and whining.  And then it turned into a full blown tantrum as she tried to stand up and get out.  I didn’t have a big list that week so I thought I’d just carry her.  She was still whining a little bit, but once she grabbed the list from my hand she calmed down a bit.

I haven’t had to carry her through the store in such a long time.  And of course the day I do, the store happened to be overly congested.  There were a bunch of women pushing their buggies at a snail’s pace with their lowly husbands lingering behind, dragging their feet.  I think it was “Bring Your Pathetically Bored Husband to Meijer Day.”  Every time a woman would come around the corner, sure enough about a minute later you’d see a guy trudging along looking down at his feet.  He’d eventually look up and let out a big sigh.  They were like little kids who were only there because they were bribed with promises of a treat.  I saw them eyeing cupcakes from the clearance bakery section.  Personally, I wanted a treat for having to maneuver through this obstacle of marital bliss on display.  Not only were there road blocks, but I picked the buggy that pulled to the left… AGAIN!  I was driving a crooked buggy with one hand while holding a baby in the other.  It just wasn’t working.

While we were going down one of the aisles, Ellie started wiggling like a puppy who just saw a squirrel.  “Let me go! Let me go!”  I had no choice but to have her stand up on the floor because I was about to drop her.  Once she was standing, she was soo happy.  “Let’s shop dad!”  I figured I could give this walking-beside-me-thing a try.  She did good for awhile.  She was pushing the buggy and giggling.  She started causing a bit of a traffic jam, but then again so were the women and their mopy husbands.  And then, she bolted.  “AAAhhhh, come and get me dad!  AH hahahaha!”  She had my list, too!  I spent a good five minutes chasing her up and down the aisles like I was trying to lasso a prairie dog from a chuck wagon.

I was able to tackle her and we headed for the baby aisle to get a box of treats.  While we were in that aisle she started taking everything off the shelves and stacking them neatly on the floor.  At this point I decided to reach for the camera.  Might as well, right?  I didn’t want Aya to think I was lying when I relayed the story to her in hopes for some sympathy.

Finally, we headed for the check-out.  When I went to select the check-out aisle I went against my instincts.  I knew it was a mistake when I got in line, but by then it was too late.  For the past month or so, our shopping trips have been so regimented that I was always able to get the same cashier.  But since Ellie knocked me off my game, I was pretty frazzled and went to the shortest line instead of my usual line.  Shortest line doesn’t always mean the best.  This cashier lady was incapable of smiling and had the craziest hair.  It was kind of like a cavewoman hair-do.  I thought I could see a bone in it like on the Flinstone’s.  She even kind of grunted like a cave woman.  “EErr urr?”  Yes, that is cilantro.  And to top it off, she was soooo sloooowwwww. The longer we stood there, the antsier Ellie was getting.  And so was I.

Between the whining, the chasing, the wiggling, the holding, the wobbly buggy, and the check-out fiasco, I was beat.   And it was barely even 11:00am!  Maybe next time I need to bribe her with promises of day old bakery treats.  I know at least I deserve one.