SNIP SNIP (I’m Talking About Coupons)

Over the summer I was given access to Aya’s coupon book and had some mild success with my first coupon experience. However, I found working within Aya’s system of coupons was not working for me. I wasn’t against coupons, I just needed my own system. If she wouldn’t give me control of her book, I was going to start my own!

With my new found freedom and independence, I started clipping coupons like a mad man. If I saw a dotted line, I grabbed the scissors. It didn’t matter what they were for, I just needed to build up a supply. Free donut with coffee purchase? SNIP! Buy one get one free breakfast sandwich? SNIP! Salad dressing, shampoo, zip-loc bags, razors, frozen pizzas, anything and everything. Even popcorn! I never buy popcorn. But with a 55 cent off coupon, maybe I will? You never know. SNIP!

So I had coupons now, but no place to put them. I needed my own coupon book. I went to a few places and searched around, but I really didn’t find anything that seemed like it would work. My coupon project had stalled. But to my surprise, Aya gave in, and gave me full control of her coupon book. It would no longer be her coupon book, but mine. My clipped coupons now had a home! There was no more stalling. It was time to go live.

On the eve of my couponing shopping trip debut, I carefully made my grocery list. I had my cup of coffee, my cooking magazine with recipes tagged, my list, and stack of coupons. I was serious. I noted all items that I had coupons for on the list. For example, next to popcorn, I put a star. This was a fool proof system. And in addition to my paper coupons, I just signed up for Mperks at Meijer (Which is where I shop exclusively. Yes, exclusively) which is an awesome program. I had no idea this program existed. It’s a virtual couponing system. You sign in at home, “clip” your coupons, and then sign in again at check out and you get your discounts. No book needed! Aya didn’t even know about this program. Step aside little missy, there’s a new Sheriff in town. Watch and learn.

On the day of, I was a little nervous. While Ellie ate her breakfast I double checked my list. I was like Santa Claus but with a different purpose. I had at least five coupons I was going to use, plus a few online ones too. This was going to be huge! I didn’t want to fumble and search through the whole book at the check-out, so as a last minute decision I pulled the “active” coupons out for easy access. When Ellie finished her breakfast, it was time to go.

Our shopping trip went well. I got everything off my list and Ellie behaved wonderfully. We were even able to return bottles and cans at the bottle return. With those and my coupons I was about to be crowned The King of Savings. “Please, look away, don’t look directly at my eyes.” Until…

When I went to get my stack of coupons, they were not there. What!? I checked my pockets in my pants, and my jacket, in Ellie’s coat, and in my man bag. They were nowhere! What did I do!?

And then my mind flashed to the kitchen table. I had pulled them out of my coupon book for easy access, but I never put them anywhere else. I left them on the table! On no! My system, my savings, my triumphant crowning! It was all falling apart before it could even happen! I looked at Ellie thinking, “I blame you! You and your demanding of juice at breakfast. You messed up my rhythm!” What would Aya think!? She’d laugh at me, and then take away the book while shaking her head in disapproval. I would be deemed incapable and unreliable to handle such tasks… again!

I stood there in line feeling defeated wondering what to do. And then I remembered I still had the coupon book. I bet I had duplicates. After all, I did clip like a mad man.  I could still salvage this situation, I thought. It was possible, I just had to be quick.

I quickly fumbled through the coupon book and retrieved all the coupons except for the popcorn one. Yes! I did it!

After the coupons, the Mperks coupons, and bottle slips I had a total savings of eighteen dollars! Booyah! It would have been $18.55, but you can’t win them all right. I think that’s brag worthy considering my last couponing trip only saved me a buck fifty.

I came, I saved, I conquered, and bought a donut on the way home.

What? I saved all that money, don’t I get a little reward?